A Dangerous Situation on the Internet: How to Help a Teenager | Complete Security

What Internet Risks Are Relevant for Minors

The Internet has penetrated deeply into our lives, however, along with its opportunities, it also carries specific threats. Suppose a teenage girl, at the request of her young man, took and sent him several of her "bold" photographs with a clear agreement that he would not show them to anyone. After a while, they quarrel, and the guy posts these photos in the school's group chat. What feelings does the girl have? Shame, anxiety, vulnerability, unwillingness to communicate with others, and sometimes even live.

Or, for example, a high school student in a multiplayer game made friends with one of the players, who offers to make money and gradually draws him into illegal actions. And his attempts to refuse are threatened that parents, school and the police will find out about everything. As a result, the teenager is desperate, does not know what to do and who to contact.

Unfortunately, both situations described are not uncommon and even typical for children and adolescents. In general, Internet risks relevant to minors can be divided into two large groups:

• content risks: materials containing violence, aggression, pornography, obscene language, promotion of gambling or drugs, inciting hatred on one or another basis;

• communication risks: theft/luring of personal information, insults, grooming, cyberstalking, cyberbullying, involvement in drug trafficking or other illegal activities, inducement to self-harm or suicide.

How to Recognize an Internet Threat in Time

You can understand that a child has difficulties that he is not able to cope with on his own if we analyze his behaviour, thoughts and emotions. The following signals and patterns can indicate problems:

• behavioural level: secretiveness, isolation, depressed mood, cold relationships with loved ones, unwillingness to communicate with friends, motor excitement (a teenager cannot find a place for himself anywhere), refusal to go to school, loss of interest in previous hobbies, sleep disturbances (too long or, on the contrary, superficial and anxious), change in appetite (overeating or loss of appetite as such, addiction to a certain type of food: sweet, salty, bitter);

• cognitive level: a teenager expresses thoughts about the complexity and difficulties of life, begins to be interested in the topic of death, conversations about the future cause him fear and uncertainty, and thoughts are confused and scattered, he often answers questions inappropriately;

• emotional level: constant feelings of anxiety, fear, feelings of powerlessness and loneliness, despair, guilt, shame.

But sometimes outwardly the child behaves as if nothing had happened, does not show his feelings in any way. Therefore, parents need to go to meet him themselves and from time to time talk with the teenager, ask what worries him, gently inviting him to dialogue.

What to Do if a Dangerous Situation Has Already Arisen

Anyone in a situation of an Internet threat feels lonely, left alone with a problem, but this feeling is especially pronounced among adolescents. In addition, they tend to consider themselves the source of problems and often experience excessive, literally unbearable feelings of guilt. They still lack life experience, and therefore the risk of suicide increases. It seems that further life is meaningless and this is the only way out. In this state, it is important how adults behave from the very beginning.

Perform the First Aid"

Not only parents can come to the aid of a teenager, but also other important adults for the child - for example, a family friend who can be trusted. Quite often, it is the fear of losing access to the Internet or gadgets that prevents parents from opening up. For adolescents whose social life is almost entirely on the Internet, such a prospect looks almost worse than the continuation of a traumatic situation.

Try to stay calm and create an atmosphere of acceptance where the child can share their concerns. Do not force him to speak - at such moments, each sentence is difficult. It is necessary first to console the teenager, help him calm down and convince him that the cause of the situation is not in him.

Instead of looking for where the child did "wrong," on the contrary, praise him for the courage to open up to you. Then help him understand the essence of the situation, try to predict its consequences. Make it clear to him that he is not alone and that together you can solve the problem. Then make a plan of action: for the next hours, the next day or week.

During the conversation, keep in mind the specific situation in which the child finds himself here and now. Try not to touch on events from the past, speak simply and openly. This approach helps to convey your calmness to the child and makes it clear that the problem can be solved.

In the first few days, a teenager is especially vulnerable - try not to be separated from him at this time, make sure that people close to him are constantly nearby.

Contact Security and Police

After the situation as a whole has become clear, write to the security service of the social network, portal or other Internet services. Gather as many details as possible and try to act quickly to minimize potential harm. Consult with the administration of the service what urgent technical measures can be taken: delete content, block a user, put one or another Internet filter.

But before deleting, do not forget to take screenshots of the correspondence or record other evidence. This will facilitate the work of law enforcement agencies. Do not hesitate to contact the police - this will help you find intruders, bring them to justice, and also prevent similar crimes in the future.

Start Working With a Psychologist

Almost always, a problematic situation on the Internet leads to mental trauma - and for all family members. Parents can experience the same range of feelings as a child - anger, shame, guilt, and loss. Therefore, the help of a psychologist cannot be neglected.

Even if the situation is resolved relatively well, the child and parents can still experience post-traumatic stress disorder for a long time. Therefore, a specialist in such a situation can literally save a life.

It is likely that one therapy session will not be enough: often anxiety, depression and suicidal thoughts return weeks and months after the threat has passed. A professional will help restore the broken personal boundaries and trust in the world, find the resources to cope with the trauma.

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